Sunday 13 December 2009

auto-epitaph

I’m gone

And if you can think of me

As always reaching further

Know this

I’ll try and find out

What happens next.


Terry called it

The Collis catastrophic effect

Always taking every experiment

Just one step further

But the outcome

Sometimes worked out right


The best evidence

Of underlying good sense

Breaking surface madness

Is Brian

Whom I recognised, and then just stopped

from slipping through my fingers


And, if going on

To my personal interview

With the silver sickle

Leaves a choice

Can I let go

a final time? You’ll know.

Sunday 29 November 2009

For my cousin

And so my naive cousin, what will you do
when all the bluster of your chosen party
simply doesn't restore your rights
and you find it's the fat cats, not the immigrants
who've taken them all away?

will you then say that, with jobs so scarce
that only men should work
and steal from me, from your wife
and from your daughters what you
now would take out of your neighbours' mouths?

It is after all the classic pattern
for those you are so blindly advocating,
Kitchen, children church their only female role,
is that really the world you really want created
for your own three girls?

And what of your brother
Immigrant himself, on the other side
of the world. Do you believe that he
should be kicked out to leave more room
for native Australians?

Wake up! why do you think the world has fought
to stop the fascists coming here?
Their tinny song of hate is no solution.
They have no answers for this world's
true crises if you pose real questions.

LMC 29 Nov 09

Friday 30 October 2009

Topiramate blues

Is that all it was,
a migraine tablet’s psycho-active side effect?
Those black dog days
When nothing worked
When all my effort went to finding
Five clear minutes without crying?

1 in 10 they say are like this,
Angry and depressed
It should be on the bloody packet
Never mind buried in the leaflet
I could get angry, but I won’t

For that is also on their list
And now I think
Those days I wouldn’t give in
on trivial points, are them not me,
And I can close this anger down


lmc 30 Oct 2009

Wednesday 28 October 2009

Mum - St Pancras

sitting in the longest champagne bar
it's hard to explain
just what I did
among all this Gothic splendour

she looks as if
I built it single-handed
rather than designing
a few electrical interfaces

so when the trains come in
their power works, the signalling,
and the customer information
tells their story

but still it was at the top
of her birthday visits
and we could all walk around
with a certain proprietal pride.

lmc 28 Oct 2009

Monday 26 October 2009

Mum - My Way

Time spirals, after all the fizz and razzmattazz,
- back to tonight, when Frank sang "My Way",
and I held your hand and cried,
thinking of the next time,
- forward to that day we'll
play it for you, but your hand will have slipped away.
I'll remember you sitting next to me

and, I bet, will hear you singing along.

LMC 24 Oct 09

Mum- St Paul's

To soar beyond our cares
and whisper with you
where my Dad once sat!

my Christmas angel will not
tell the secret of our
journey to the dome

and of the unexpected
grace bestowed
upon your birthday

LMC 24-Oct-2009

Sunday 11 October 2009

Recipe for contentment

to hold my Miyajima bowl
- fit perfectly in my hand -
think only of my father
and his Sayonara memories

forget the bigger bowl of the set
my step-mother kept
not grieve for my father's
signet ring my aunt took when he died

retail therapy has only
limited effect to fill the hurt
- and space at home
is running out -


be glad for all I have
for Brian and all he does
above all, stop this envy
and be satisfied

LMC

Saturday 10 October 2009

Nobel prize

Please can I have the Nobel prize for Literature? I'm sure it will inspire me to write wonderful poetry and the one great novel.

Friday 9 October 2009

Amazon sorted

Here's my letter, published in today's Guardian.

Monday 20 July 2009

my secret garden


my last flat in Paris had a secret garden
it took me weeks to find the entrance
~it was via "l'ecole de rire"
then I could sit and watch
the strange and fanciful t'ai chi classes
with twirly hands, the garden birds and fish,
and see the crocodile of monks disappear
back through their secret door in the garden shed

Sunday 12 July 2009

Paris!

You're not Emma Bovary
so stop mourning your sojourn
in Paris like some lost
civilisation

you're an engineer
not a princess
pay your own way
you don't need "les frais"

A point of this career
is to be able
to afford to travel
when to want to

Anyway, your Paris was
always found around
a cafe table
with your friends

LMC

Saturday 11 July 2009

Refinding my Italian books

the tidy woman has no such joys as these.
Lost for months my Italian workbooks
five years of exercises, jokes and learning to
lap my tongue around that teasing language - lost!

now today when Brian unearths them
from the depths of a bureau drawer where
I had put them safe and then forgotten
it's like meeting an old lost friend again!

From "Franco ha un vestito blu" and
"Brutta stronza!", to "Non Sono Quà"
it maps as well a magic friendship,
born bizarrely in a storm.

Lessons at the Paris mosque,
in cafés, Tunisia, Sardinia and more
but more, a friend to really talk with
e che mi manca perchè non sono là

Tuesday 2 June 2009

Sketch



Working on my laptop,
what's Sketch chasing now?
Aha, my watch makes a moving sunbeam
Light exercise for a young cat

Friday 15 May 2009

Peonies on my Birthday

George Collis 2 Nov 1925 - 15 May 1979




The peonies flower every year on my birthday
It was always remarked upon
But no-one ever thought to tell me why.
I just thought liking peonies was part of your love
of Japan, like calling our home Sayonara
Teaching me to use chopsticks,
To open Japanese trickboxes and to
Sort of count to five- (ichi, ni, san, frei, go)

Even when I offered to bring you peonies from
My new flat in Westgate, "Oh no" you said
"You can’t cut peonies, they shed their petals."
Even now I remember your smile
But you didn’t think to tell me why
And far too soon you were gone. I tried
To get a peony to grow on your grave
But as you know too well, they’re fussy flowers

Yet still the peonies at my mother's
Bloom on my birthday every year
And in Paris on my birthday I saw the peonies,
Cut flowers in the florist's. The only time
I heard your voice, saying “Buy those peonies
From me for your birthday, they must be special.” And so
They were, they kept a week. I’ve saved the petals
And still no-one thought to tell me.

Finally last birthday (52), my mother saw I didn’t know.
The peonies, passed from a great aunt via my grandfather
To my father, had sulked ever since their transplant
Then the day, the very day that I was born
You flew up to the hospital crying, “The peonies
Have flowered! They’ve finally flowered!” Later you tried
To cut and bring them to us but they shed their petals.
I was so lucky not to be called Peony, considering.

Monday 4 May 2009

Mum - Cherry Blossom Time

A dance of leaves and fluttered petals 
An aching stubbornness of tangled branches 
And yet a flash of laughter as you 
Turn, still young at eighty-two

Tuesday 24 March 2009

Mrs King

As I'm reading all the posts on Ada Lovelace day, it reminds me of Vaughn King, who was such an inspiration to me.
When I knew her she was a little old lady who lived near us in Kingsgate, near Broadstairs in Kent.
I don't know her maiden name, but I remember she'd graduated from Cambridge at 18 and had worked with Kodak in the early days of photography.
I was the first of my family to go to Grammar School and was having a difficult time at home and school around the age of 15 to 18. She was a real support to me and kept me working hard to go to university.
She was well enough to see me get there, but soon after contracted Alzheimer's disease and had to go into a home.
I would have liked her to see me become a Chartered Engineer.

Ada Lovelace Day

Amy Johnson died delivering planes to airbases in the war as part of the Air Transport Auxiliary.
The women of the ATA flew every type of plane, many more than the fighter pilots, flying the planes from the factories to the bases.
Before the war, Amy set numerous flying records, including being the first women to fly solo from Britain to Australia, and set the solo record for flying from London to Cape Town.
This blog has been issued in support of AdaLovelaceDay (http://www.pledgebank.com/AdaLovelaceDay)

Friday 9 January 2009

Talisman to Delormel




Swing around the lion of Belfort

Queue for almond croissants in the sun

Wait for a table in the bistrot des Pingouins

And slip into that old vie Parisienne


Keeping a key to that art deco marvel

Saying hi to Sam Becket in the cimitière

Laughing with the commerçants in the rue du marché

Bonnes adresses in the quartier Daguerre


Vernissages and Sunday flea markets

Meeting friends on the pont des Arts

Picnic parks and pinpoint parking

That key a talisman to my Paris fair

Thursday 8 January 2009

For Balkh


For Balkh بلخ

Dust pounded to finer dust, our homes and families gone,

Our history re-written, who knows us now?

Even our city has been renamed so often its lineage is lost.

A town in a war-torn country, itself known only for its terrorists

Its hated Taliban and its opium farms

In the ruins you may find the clues, these fragments may yet say,

Once we were proud Bactrians, a merchant capital on the Silk Road,

Home of lapis lazuli, our palaces full of Chinese lacquers, Indian ivories,

Greek and Egyptian statuary. Here, Alexander took Roxanne,

Our daughter, as his wife, and Bactra as his Eastern capital.


On the wind you may yet hear our songs,

Cradle of magi, poets and sages, birthplace of Zoroaster,

Of Jelaleddin Rumi, poet of the whirling dervishes.

Young women still murmur to Rabia Balkhi, killed by her family

For loving a slave, a final poem left in her own blood.



Travellers spoke of our wonders once. Dear old Xuanzang,

Who carried Buddhism home to China on his back,

Noted the hundred temples on his visit, the radiant holy relics,

But criticised the laxity of our thousand monks.


Marco Polo called us a splendid city, (though now much reduced in size).

Even so, the city sacked by Genghis Khan was an Islamic cosmopolis,

Still rich in Buddhist shrines and Zoroastran fire temples.

He razed our homes and put our families to the sword (again).

The city survived, a Moghul, then an Uzbek town,

But the glory faded and the old town was a maze of azure-painted ruins.

So even now, you hear of us and do not know whereof you speak.

Our Bactrian camels crossed the world (and that includes the wet bits).

The Ghan railway in Australia was named for us

To honour the sweat of Afghan camel herders who made it possible,

Opening up some never imagined extension of the Silk Road, East.



Yet still your bombs crash down upon the ruins of our history.

Where once we were known as the mother of all cities.

We dare not walk these paths, for Russian and Western mines still lie

Among 3000 years of grace, all broken now,

Fragments pounded from dust to finer dust, our heritage erased.



by Lynne M. Collis ©2007 All Rights Reserved


Permission to quote was requested from Colin Thubron and his publishers, stating that he would be credited as follows: "with thanks to Colin Thubron for inspiration and quotes from "Shadow of the Silk Road" Chatto & Windus 2006". No response was received.

Wednesday 7 January 2009

Venezia Sept 2008

A week of glorious colour
A perfect Madonna, Buranese crazy houses
And Tintoretto's St Tibbles at the last supper

Photos of Brian
Up san Giorgio's campanile
leaning over bridges
Above all, riding round on vaporettos in the sun

©LMC2008

Not Counting - 11 November

She sits in the rubble of her home.
Huge brown eyes watch
as the glorious dead are counted.
The horseman doesn't ask her name

His friend is pleased to see
that some of the unnumbered
civilian casualties
are already tainting the water supply,

and adding to their brother's work
(He's busily cheering on the soldiers
who've left their tanks of chemicals
leeching into local fields).

The fourth horseman will be along later for her. 
They'll all be skin and bone together.
Without a count it all goes round again
No-one will lay poppies.

© LMC 2008

Chott El Jerid / Non sono quà

I am not here 
The wind scours my shell 
The sun, a rising edge, 
Fires me to salt. 
 I am not here 
Once I poured from the mountains 
To the lake My colours swirling 
 Ma'shallah ma'shallah I disappear
 I am not here I shall return
Non sono quà
Il vento sfeggia la mia conchiglia
Il sole, un taglio di luce in ascesa
M'imfiamma e mi transforma in sale
Non sono quà
Un tempo scorrero dalle montagne
Fino al lago, i miei colori un turbine acceso
Ma'shallah ma'shallah
Sto scomparendo
Non sono quà
Ritornerò
© LMC aprile 2004

Létra




Walking down from the vineyard of an evening
the sun would be striking off the hilltops
as we followed the tractor down
with the last load of grapes for the press

the setting sun would fire the red roofs scarlet
through the evening haze
and gild the honey stone
until the very countryside looked blessed

Morning brought a different colour
A cold transformation firing the vine leaves
russet, purple, red and gold
and icing the grapes with a silver dust

Walking up the rows in pairs
singing through the backache, filling buckets
with bunches of ripe Gamay, working towards
the glass of wine at the end of row break

Ridha's underwater camel dance
the whole day Malcolm gave to bread soup songs
(tunes from West Side Story), Leader of the Pack
from me and Brian with crash effects


And evening time, the golden years,
Steve's violin against the farmhouse wall,
after dinner, songs and wine, capped always
by Antonin's 'Ma Beaujolaise'

© LMC 2009

GAZA 6 Jan 2009

Israel, why can you not understand
just how each bomb makes Hamas stronger?
Have you forgotten how your own strength
Was forged from your adversity?
If every push against you
Makes you dig your heels in harder
Don't you think the Palestinians
Trapped in Gaza feel the same?
Unless you open up this Gaza-ghetto,
learn to live a different way,
then every day you fall into
the trap that Hamas set you
and the children of both sides

are forced to die all over again.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/jan/07/gaza-israel-palestinians

©LMC 2009